Fantasy Selves

Yo! So have you been wondering about the status of my novel for National November Writing Month???  Yeah, that's not happening.  :)  

I loved the idea of writing a story but not so much the actual writing. Over the years, I've let go of a lot of different aspects of my fantasy self, and it's like shedding a skin that didn't fit. There was the "me" that was going to become a morning runner. Or the "me" who was going to cook dinner every dang night. The "me" who was the ultimate classroom helper. 

This "me" who writes novels in her spare time? Pllleeease! Although it is sort of lovely that no matter how old I get or how tired I become of being anyone but myself, I can still dream new dreams. Maybe someday I will come home from a long, sweaty run where I feel as if I am flying through the streets of my darkened city in order to write pages and pages of words that make sense and flow beautifully. But not today (...or tomorrow or next week because I've got other s*#t to do.)

When I was researching "fantasy selves" for this post, I stumbled upon this post which led me to find this book. Fascinating! I love how interconnected fantasy selves and decluttering are.


Because hope is not lost. Just like Ike said, "Plans are worthless, but planning is everything." All those thoughts I had about a woman who gets her life in order by decluttering her home had a profound effect on the level of clutter in my own home. 

The English Room by Holly Phillips

I started in my daughter's room. She is a tiny maximalist whose mantra -- like Iris Apfel's -- is "More is more, less is a bore!" She pushed me to continue, though, even when I wanted to stop to rest. It was breathtaking! Five big bags of recycling, one HUGE bag of donations, and a few trash bags later, our house feels lighter. Again. For now. It's really a process and I'm learning that it's something I have to come back to every so often. 

Having recently read Design Mom: How To Live With Kids: Room By Room I was also a lot looser about some things that used to make me an uptight stressball. I let my daughter go nuts with washi tape and 3M hooks to make her walls look the way she wanted them to rather than my imperfect vision for her.


Along the same lines, I deactivated my Facebook account last week. It's the sort of thing that I would normally announce to everyone in my life using -- ba dum dumm -- Facebook, but that's not an option now. Anyhoo, I feel FREE without it. Truly liberated. Like there was a party in my pocket that I constantly needed to check in on and now I don't. Interestingly, the weekly theme of my favorite podcast this week is to "delete a soul-sucking app." I may go back to it once the addictiveness of it wears off, and then again, maybe I won't. 

I've been spending more time on Instagram and it's my modest goal to reach 500 followers. But then again, maybe not. With fewer followers, I can use my own voice and say what I want to say. Maybe that's a false choice? Maybe I can have tons of followers, oodles and oodles of followers, and yet somehow find a way to still be "me" -- the "me" who changes her mind and does one thing rather than another. The "me" who interprets and poeticizes and can't take a good selfie. Regardless, if you want to see photos of the refrigerator cabinet that I dreamed and my dad built or some of the decluttering progress, check it out.

From InStyle magazine via Copy Cat Chic

One last image to leave you with before I go: I am utterly obsessed with the green on these lamps. It feels so fresh with all of the airy, textural neutrals. And lately I'm crazy-obsessed with Moroccan wedding blanket-anything (like the pouf on the left). I think it's due to the sequins. 

What are you loving lately? DO you have a fantasy self you've shed, or still need to let go of?